Every life is different. We all have a walk to walk. For the most part, I love my life, but there are these dark little corners that sometimes loom larger than life and nearly push me over the edge. Do you know what I mean? For me, one of them is South Dakota. Until four years ago, I could have cared less about the state. It was someplace west of me. Laura Ingles lived there. It was below North Dakota. End of story. But now, half of my grandchildren live there along with a third of my children. Twelve hundred miles or two days away. It may as well be New Zealand. I wish I could get over it but I’m realizing tonight as I sit here in the dark typing away, that I will never get over it and it will never change. It’s such a hard place to be—this dark little corner of my life.
I’ve also realized that this dark corner is the reason for my struggle to stay “happy.” I have that word in quotes because I’m not sure it’s the right word. My happiness shouldn’t depend on where my family lives, and is happiness even that important? Peace in my soul? Contentment? Surrender? Ah, I think it’s that last one! Why can’t I just surrender this to God and, as my friend says, “Get over it?”
Perhaps it all started when third-grade heart was broken. A very dear family were moving to Canada. I can still tell you right where I was when I heard them tell my parents the news. What? Moving away? No! That day, my perfect little world spun out of control. I couldn’t understand or accept it. Why? How could they? From that point on, teary goodbyes became part of my life—those heart-rending moments that seem to take days to recover from.
Oh, you are such a baby, Wanda! Some people say “good-bye” and never see their loved ones again! Some have had to say “good-bye” and live with the fact that their son or daughter is fighting a war, and that someone is trying to kill them! Some have been parted by death from their children. GET OVER IT!
Whew! These pep talks really help! Thanks for listening. And now for the rest of the story. There will be no eternal, teary good-byes for me!
The other night, my husband and I watched a nice little “feel good” movie. Sometimes we just need a little escape time and it was fun. But one thing that really bothered me was the worldview presented. They continually referred to the universe as directing their lives. Is this some sort of new religion or philosophy? How sad. “God” was nothing more than a swear word. I can’t imagine believing that I would never see my loved ones again when I die. How horrible! To believe that I just dissolve into nothingness when I breathe my last breath—that this life is all there is—now that is a very overwhelming, teary goodbye, which I am so thankful I will never face with my children, and, Lord willing, with my grandchildren as they come to know the Lord as their Savior. That hope or confident expectation, which is the born-again believer’s definition of the word, dispels the dark, little corner and gives meaning to life! Knowing that we will be together forever with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ brings joy, and peace, and… happiness.
AND, Jesus can be anyone’s Savior. Some mornings when I wake up and start to pray, I will begin by thanking God for all He is to me:
Dear Heavenly Father, thank your for being my heavenly Father, Prince of Peace, my Comforter, my Guide, my Savior and Master and Lord and Shepherd and High Tower and Refuge…
Is He that to you? It only takes one thing to have it all: the humility of heart to surrender your live to Him—acknowledging your sinfulness and His overwhelming gift of life and amazing grace! And although I may never see you in this life, I hope that someday we will meet on the other side, in our heavenly home where the universe is dissolved and Jesus sits on His throne!
“These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, that you may know that you have eternal life, and that you may continue to believe in the name of the Son of God.” 1 John 5: 13
“Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also.” John 14:1-3 (emphasis added)